Hello Blog World! I’m feeling more like my “normal” self. You see the quotes around normal and know what that means. So I mentioned a churning feeling in my stomach yesterday. Thought it was just me being so in tune with what’s going on around me that it was causing me to have an unstable stomach. But, what I didn’t tell you my friends is that I was making regular trips to my kitchen counter where the brownies I made for baby girl the other night, were located. Yeah so needless to say, today I pay for my transgressions from yesterday. LOL. But that’s okay. Outside of a little bubble in my belly (amongst other issues I will spare you the details), I’m good.
I know I complained about blogging yesterday, but I’m actually enjoying it. It truly is cathartic to just get all your emotions out through writing, for me anyway. I kinda feel like Carrie Bradshaw from my most favorite show in the history of the world Sex and the City. Only without the million dollar shoe collection, and the millionaire boyfriend, turned fiancee, turned husband. Plus she’s white and lives in New York City with no children and I’m black and live in the suburbs of Chicago and am a single mother. Yep, but I’m just like Carrie Bradshaw. I connected to the artsy fartsy writer in her. I’m so not artistic in that creative, let’s make this neat and pretty, cut, copy, glue, sew, draw, color kinda way. But I love words. I love poetry. I love languages. J’aime les langues. I bet Carrie Bradshaw was an English Lit Major.
Sometimes I forget what it is that I really enjoy doing. Adulting and working has a way of shifting you away from the things that bring you joy or even peace. If we get too far from those things, we get bogged down with the worries of the world and forget how to balance ourselves out. I am so grateful for this platform. I forgot what writing does for me, and how it helped me get through some painfully tough times in my adolescence. After I wrote my blog last night, I actually didn’t need to go out. I stayed at home and enjoyed a peaceful evening by myself, with myself and my thoughts. My frantic swerving thoughts, full of emotions, sadness, and grief, they were no longer stuck in my head, haunting me. I had released those thoughts onto my blog. After I wrote, I was left with a calm quiet, an exhale.
Now if I can only figure out how to make my site all nice and pretty like everyone else’s. No worries, I’ll be recruiting some of my co worker/fellow bloggers for a tutorial.